


Reunion at Dawn Redux: Absolution

by OutrealmKeeper



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Azure Moon character death mentioned, F/M, Pre-Relationship, minor Azure Moon spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-25
Updated: 2020-12-25
Packaged: 2021-03-11 05:53:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28320006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OutrealmKeeper/pseuds/OutrealmKeeper
Summary: Dimitri apologizes to Byleth for the pain he caused her in his madness.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/My Unit | Byleth
Comments: 4
Kudos: 75





	Reunion at Dawn Redux: Absolution

Professor Byleth Eisner tripped as she trudged her way up the stairs to the Goddess Tower. She should return to her quarters and get some rest. She’d been awake for nearly forty hours now, and she felt dead on her feet.

It wasn’t fair. She’d been asleep for five years. One would think her body would store up an excess of energy as a reserve. Sadly, that was not the case, and the last several days in particular seemed to have sapped all her strength.

The death of Rodrigue had been a devastating blow, and the army was disheartened. Aside from losing a significant source of financial and military resources, her former students were suffering varying degrees of shock and sorrow.

Byleth was doing all that she could for them in their time of greatest need. She'd ordered her Lions to rest and organized subtle ways for each of them to find solace, though her primary efforts were focused on Dimitri and Felix (with help from the others). They were by far the most affected, but they were also the least likely to ask for help. 

Contrary to one might think, Felix had been easy enough. Byleth took him to the training grounds to spar, while Ashe and Ingrid had been tasked with preparing his favorite meal for dinner. Furthermore, she’d scheduled him for greenhouse duty with Annette, well aware that he enjoyed the spritely mage’s penchant for singing silly songs when working.

As for Dimitri... well, that was another matter altogether.

Byleth reached the top of the stairs. She stumbled out through the open door to the tower ramparts. Then with a soft groan, she heaved herself onto the stone barrier and swung her legs around to face the brightening dawn. She adjusted the angle of the Sword of the Creator hanging at her waist for comfort and closed her eyes to bask in the sun’s rays warming her face. 

She had no memory of her long sleep, other than the lingering sensation of cold and darkness. Fortunately, the only lasting effects were an insatiable mental restlessness, a desire to spend the daylight hours outside, and an increased need to socialize with others.

However, even she needed some time alone now and then, and the Goddess Tower was one of the places where she could find a moment’s solitude to think. No one knew to look for her here, or at least none would consider it until the rest of the monastery had been searched. Dimitri was the only person who might think of it, but she was not sure if he was in the right frame of mind to recall it.

Their conversation in the rain a few nights ago seemed to indicate that he was showing signs of waking from the haze of insatiable bloodlust, but she hadn’t seen him in person since then to confirm it. After consoling him, she had transferred him, soaking wet and silent, into the care of Dedue, Sylvain and Mercedes. She’d asked the men to help the prince clean up and change into fresh clothes, and Mercedes used her Faith magic to heal his wounds. That done, they’d escorted him to his old dorm room to sleep, before they too took their rest. 

According to Gilbert, Dimitri had yet to either wake or emerge from his room, which Byleth considered a good sign. From the dark circles under his eyes, she presumed he had not experienced a full night’s sleep in a very long time.

Regarding the rest of her comrades, she’d made sure to check on them at regular intervals, often taking them in pairs to have a meal or inviting them to tea. She wanted to make another round later this morning, hopefully before their next strategy meeting. 

She also needed to inspect the current crop of vegetables growing in the greenhouse, take some weapons to the blacksmith for repair, and ask Hanneman about a new spell she was trying to master. Finally, she should get a report from both the Abyss Keeper and the Gatekeeper (she was too tired to remember their names at the moment).

There was never enough time, never enough hours in the day.

By the goddess, she was tired. Maybe she could fit in a quick nap before she had to start the day.

Byleth’s eyes snapped open. The stillness of the moment was broken by the sound of a loud clunk, followed by the long creak of the door opening, then closing. Footsteps began to reverberate in the tower as someone ascended the staircase.

Byleth recognized Dimitri’s heavy footfall, and her hand – in spite of her hopes regarding any potential improvement – darted to grip the handle of her sword. The rest of her body tensed in trepidation, and she immediately hated herself for it. While Dimitri’s rage against their enemies was merciless, and his words towards everyone had been cruel, he had not once raised a hand against those he once called “friend”. No matter how bad his delusions or how fierce his thirst for revenge, she knew that the sweet, kind prince she had mentored was still there, buried deep beneath the anguish. That prince could not, _would_ not, harm her.

Even so, it took great effort to release her grip on the weapon and breathe out enough times to relax her muscles. No matter what her heart believed or her mind reasoned, her instincts were still that of a mercenary, trained by Fódlan’s best to anticipate an attack from anyone or anything.

Jeralt had forgotten his own teachings only once, and he had paid for it with his life.

Byleth looked over her shoulder at him as he completed the climb, remaining silent until his undamaged eye fell on her.

“There you are, Professor. I was hoping I’d find you here.”

He didn’t look particularly happy or hopeful, but neither did he appear as broken as he had been when last they spoke.

“And so you have.” Byleth smiled hesitantly, encouraged by the absence of anger in Dimitri’s voice. “Though it is far too early to be roaming around the monastery. You should try to get as much sleep as you can while you have the opportunity.”

“I could say the same for you,” Dimitri countered. “Goddess knows that no one works harder, or has done more for this army than you, particularly these last couple days. And, though I am sorry to ask so much of you, we will continue to rely on you heavily throughout the remainder of the war. It is paramount that you look after your own health and well being as well.”

Byleth hardly knew what to say, not only because of the words themselves, but because of the way he spoke them. Gone was the mocking tone, guttural growls and feral madness that had accompanied everything he’d said to her since her awakening. This was not the self-proclaimed monster that had threatened to use her until the flesh fell from her bones. This was her beloved student – no – her _friend_ , and he was self aware enough to acknowledge her tactical value, but caring enough to know that she had limits.

“I haven’t done anything special or out of the ordinary,” she insisted. She knew him well enough to know that he might interpret many of her actions as necessities due to a failure on his part. That might be the case in some instances, but they were her choices to make, and she would not allow him to add them to his already overburdened conscience. 

“Oh yes you have,” he said, almost smiling a little. “The Gatekeeper filled me in. He overhead you and Catherine discussing how, and I quote, _‘Edelgard isn’t about to back off while we lick our wounds’._ And yet, somehow, we’ve been able to do just that. And that is because you and the other church leaders have been running yourselves ragged, protecting Garreg Mach and making provisions for the next stages of our campaign.”

Byleth shrugged. “Rodrigue’s death had a profound effect on all of you. You needed time to grieve and reassess your willingness to continue this war. We bought you that time. Besides, all we did was take out some small enemy battalions and the odd demonic beast or two. We weren’t about to charge off to Enbarr without you.”

Dimitri nodded. “That is well. In any case, I’m glad I found you. There are a few things I wish to discuss with you, if you are amenable.”

“Of course,” Byleth said. She kept her face and voice passive, but in truth, a warmth that had nothing to do with the sun was coursing through her. Mere seconds ago, she was ready to defend herself against a potentially deranged prince with no interest in associating with anyone. Now that same prince was calmly and politely requesting to have a conversation with her. “Shall we go to the dining hall? I could make us some breakfast.”

Dimitri looked at his feet and shuffled. “I’d like that, but before we do, there are things I want to say to you in private, and here,” he gestured around the space, “is as good a place as any to ensure we are not disturbed.”

“As you wish.” Byleth turned her body around to face him and crossed her legs at the ankles. She waited patiently for him to collect his thoughts.

Dimtri folded his arms and closed his eye. “First of all, I wanted to tell you that I’ve given a lot of thought to our discussion, and I’ve come to a decision.”

Byleth tilted her head ever-so-slightly. “And?”

Dimitri lifted his chin and looked at her. “You and Rodrigue both said that I should follow my heart and do what I believe to be right. And what I believe is that I have ignored the suffering of my people long enough. Once the others have assembled, I will give the order to redirect our efforts towards liberating Fhirdiad.”

“I see,” Byleth said. “For what it’s worth, I agree with you, and I whole-heartedly support it. I am certain that the others will concur.”

“Thank you. I am not quite as confident as you, but I intend to stand by that decision. Your support and guidance mean more to me than you know, especially in light of how I've been treating you. Which leads me neatly to my next point.”

Dimitri uncrossed his arms and released a heavy exhale. “Professor, I... um...” He bowed his head and blinked rapidly. His voice cracked as he continued, “I am so sorry for all the terrible things I’ve said to you, and the horrible way I’ve been treating you since you’ve returned.”

He returned his gaze to the floor. “I could say that I was too blinded by my quest for vengeance to see the pain I’ve caused you, and that is true in some part, but to attribute it solely to that is merely an excuse. I chose to ignore your voice in favor of those of the dead. I was more than willing to cast you aside, to forget the trust and friendship between us, if it meant I could claim Edelgard's head."

Dimitri waved his hand at the space around them. “Five years ago, I stood in this very spot, and wished that we would be together forever. Such a thing cannot be if I don’t treat you with the respect you deserve. I know full well that it will take time and much hard work to regain your trust. But know that I am fully prepared to do whatever it takes to repair our relationship.”

“Dimitri...” Byleth lowered her chin and forced back the tears that were beginning to well. She wasn’t ashamed of them, but she had sins of her own to confess. She couldn’t turn into a blubbering mess until the obstacles that stood between them were laid bare.

She hopped down off the ramparts and used the sudden movements to compose herself. She turned to face him, but kept her distance out of respect for his personal space, even though she wanted nothing more than to throw her arms around him.

“Dimitri, I will not say that your hostile behavior had no effect on me. However, the pain I felt, and the tears I’ve shed, were not because of it. Rather, my greatest distress stems from the knowledge that all of my former students, you especially, have and continue to suffer so much loss and hardship, and I am powerless to change it.” Her hands clenched into fists at her sides. “My skills as a mercenary, the abilities gifted by the goddess, my crest, even the Sword of the Creator... in the moments that mattered most, they all amounted to nothing.”

Dimitri frowned. “I don’t understand. Your skills and abilities have saved us countless times. Moreover, you have ever guided and shielded us with the kindest of hearts. None of us would be here today were it not for you.”

Byleth shook her head. This would be the first time she had voiced her deepest fears aloud, but if anyone should be privy to them, it should be him. “Perhaps you’re right. If I had listened to Rhea, if I had stayed with you and the rest of the students that day five years ago, I may have been able to help put a stop to this war before it truly began. And I may have been able to prevent the many tragedies that you and our friends have endured.”

Dimitri’s mouth fell open at her admission. “You can’t know that for certain. By the goddess, Professor, you are not to blame, and none of us hold you accountable for the advent of this war! We - I - never blamed you for disappearing. Surely you know that.”

“Are you so certain of that? I cannot help but wonder if at least some of the anger you feel is because I wasn’t there when you needed me, because I failed you. I would understand if it is. It’s not as though it would be completely unwarranted.” 

“Professor – no! I didn’t… I wasn’t…”

For a brief moment, Dimitri’s incredulity reminded Byleth of a dark night long ago. It had been raining for several days, and she had been keeping a silent vigil beside the fresh grave of her beloved father, heedless of hunger or health. It was still too soon for well-meaning condolences to have any meaning beyond filling the awkward emptiness of the tense air, and at first, none could move her from her place of mourning.

None but Dimitri, that is. Eventually, he managed to pull her away from Jeralt’s resting place and steered her into the Knight’s Hall. They had sat together beside a roaring fire, steaming cups of tea in hand. She could not remember all the words that had been exchanged, but she did recall lamenting her failure to prevent her father’s death. Nothing Dimitri said had swayed her at the time (though thankfully her perspective had evolved upon reflection).

He had stared at her then, just as he was now, with slack-jawed, disbelief written on his face, heedless of the powers she possessed that should have restored her father to life.

But that power that had not been enough, had _never_ been enough to protect what she treasured most.

“Professor, when you disappeared and I believed you to be dead, I fell into despair, so much so that I thought I’d never know happiness again. It was something of a tipping point for me. I could find no hope in the dark times that followed, and madness fully took me until I had no purpose other than seeking retribution from those that had turned their backs on the kingdom, and raining vengeance down upon Edelgard.”

Byleth kept her features cool and collected, but she mentally flinched at the rough edge that had returned to Dimitri’s voice. Fortunately, he seemed to catch himself and breathed very deliberately in and out a few times before he continued.

“My anger and my hate for the empire had consumed me so completely, there was simply no room for joy at your return. I cannot speak for the others, but I can assure you, I was never, NEVER angry at you for disappearing, not once.” He spoke his next words in a barely audible whisper. “I was wrecked by it.”

“I’m so sorry, Dimitri,” Byleth said. She was relieved to hear that his fury wasn’t directed towards her, but it did not change her resolve. “I can’t go back and change what I did that day five years ago, but I promise to do all I can to make it up to you.”

“There’s really no need for that, Professor. After all, you were trying to save Rhea. There’s no way you or anyone else could have predicted what would happen to you.”

“Maybe not, but that fact remains, I made a choice that day. And that choice had consequences, unintentional though they were, and I must accept my responsibility for them.”

“As do I.” Dimitri waved his hands. “I mean... I didn’t mean, not about you or yours or...” He shrugged.

Byleth laughed softly. “Dimitri, we could go back and forth with this, or argue about our sins until the end of time. Self-reflection is important, but at this point, it is far more imperative that we offer the apologies we owe, accept whatever forgiveness is offered, and start putting in the work that’s needed to achieve what absolution we can. And perhaps... we can do that together from now on?”

“Heh.” Dimitri’s lips began to quirk upward. “Spoken like the future archbishop.”

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I still have hope that Rhea is alive, and that in time, she will be well enough to return to her post.”

“I agree. But as to your previous point, I would like that.”

“Good. Then to start...” She took a single step towards him. “Regarding your apology earlier, I forgive you Dimitri, for your harsh words and merciless deeds. There will be much to do to earn the pardon of the masses, but I will be with you every step of the way. And before you object, please do not say you are unworthy of it - both my forgiveness and my help.”

Dimitri somehow looked at once both ecstatic and broken by her declaration. A sound like a sob escaped his throat. “V-very well. I will not say it aloud, though I know it to be true.” He wiped his hand down his face. “Thank you.”

He composed himself after a few beats. “Unfortunately, I cannot offer you the same, because whatever you may believe in your heart, there is nothing to forgive. I will, however, say what I should have said the morning of your return.” 

At last, he smiled. “Professor, I am relieved and elated beyond words that you are alive. I missed you.”

Byleth grinned back. “I missed you too, Dimitri.” She held out her hand to him, just as she had months ago, the morning of her awakening.

Dimitri glanced at the outstretched appendage, then at her face. She heard him take a sharp inhale before he matched her giddy expression. He took two deliberate steps towards her and raised both arms.

Byleth hesitated for only a second, but then she laughed and she took the last step towards him. She wrapped her arms around his waist and rested her head against his chest.

His heartbeat seemed to increase as he enfolded her in his embrace. He sighed.

“Welcome home, Professor.”

Byleth allowed a small stream of happy tears to escape from beneath her lashes. “Welcome back, Dimitri. It’s so good to see you again.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Comments and kudos greatly appreciated!


End file.
